Dear Dev,
There are number of terms used in this thread, nishyama karma,jeevatma,moksha,narayana etc etc..
And you are sincere and indicated indirectly that you don't know what these terms mean actually.(that is what you mean, when you said i dont know that much philosophy and spirtualiity)
My suggestion is never mind these terms and only sure thing beyond doubt is 'you exist" ie, "I'
So let us find out "who is this 'I", It is not difficult at all, just like we think about other things, we can think about 'I' thought too.
As each thought arises, you can ask yourself: “To whom is this thought?” The answer will be, “to me”; then hold on to that “me”.
Any desire automatically disappears when we hold to 'I' thought. Stress, confusion, worries all disappear. This is my experience, please test this.
If you can't hold to 'I' thought, then instead of any mantra, just repeat the "I", "I". Test this also and share us the result.
If you ask me "I" is the first name of God not Sriman Narayana
