Live-ins considered as marriage ??

[swamykool]

Married but the husband or wife dies and then the person gets remarried. In fact especially for a lady who is a widow or divorcee, remarriage is not allowed. Is it also not adharmic in a way? Can she ever forget the good life she had with her first husband? Ladies are emotional and so the binding would be stronger. It is only said wrt women that if she loves one, he is the only one in her life.

Dev ji,

Allow me to answer you with one particular shloka.

nashte-mrite-pravrajite kleeve cha patitey patau |
etad panchaswapatsu narinam patiranyo vidhiyate ||

Parashar Samhita.

the husband (patau) who is spoilt (nashte), who is dead (mrite) who has renounced the world (pravrajite), who is impotent (kleev) and who has been ostracised in society (patite)

women who are endowed with the above 5 kinds of husbands like these (etad pancha-swapatsu narinam), taking another husband is lawful unto them (patiranyo vidhiyate).

In the vast vichaar-sabha that was held in Calcutta somewhere in the 1860s, the whole Pandit Samaj of North and Central India and nearly all the Rajas and Zamindars of Bengal united against one issue and one man - the issue of widow remarriage (vidhava vivaha) and Pandit Ishwar Chandra Vidyasagar. In that assembly the arguments of the Pandit Samaj was defeated by this one shloka quoted by Pandit Vidyasagar. And the power of this shloka convinced the British Govt. to promulgate the widow remarriage act.

This is what our law books say. Shastras are very clear on many intricate matters. Unfortunately most Hindus are brought up on a confused jumble, the clear light of the Shastras often confuse us.

Regards
swamykool

[Dev]

Hi Swamykool:

That is interesting. I have never read that. As far as I know, vedic people just say, irrespective of what the person is, marriage once happened, she has to live with him and it is her destiny. Anyway if free will is given, then many not only men but women may also not pass these tests and many have to get remarried may be.

One who is cheating on his wife, who is impotent, earns no money, has severe diseases, is harsh and beats his wife often, who drinks severely and one who suspects his wife, one who dislikes his wife, in all these cases,
he is his wife is entitled to remarry according to you.
Similarly the same when his wife has these weaknesses.
Interesting but then I am just imagining, if this rule were to come out as per law, then infinite number of marriages would occur again.

Dev

[Dev]

Hi Swamykool:

That is interesting. I have never read that. As far as I know, vedic people just say, irrespective of what the person is, marriage once happened, she has to live with him and it is her destiny. Anyway if free will is given, then many not only men but women may also not pass these tests and many have to get remarried may be.

One who is cheating on his wife, who is impotent, earns no money, has severe diseases, is harsh and beats his wife often, who drinks severely and one who suspects his wife, one who dislikes his wife, in all these cases,
he is his wife is entitled to remarry according to you.
Similarly the same when his wife has these weaknesses.
Interesting but then I am just imagining, if this rule were to come out as per law, then infinite number of marriages would occur again.

Dev

[swamykool]

One who is cheating on his wife, who is impotent, earns no money, has severe diseases, is harsh and beats his wife often, who drinks severely and one who suspects his wife, one who dislikes his wife, in all these cases,
he is his wife is entitled to remarry according to you.
Similarly the same when his wife has these weaknesses.
Interesting but then I am just imagining, if this rule were to come out as per law, then infinite number of marriages would occur again.

Not as per me, Dev ji, as per Parashar. Who am I to give judgement? And this is Law, Hindu Law. In the Shastras these segments are known as Vidhi-Vidhan (Law and Judgement).

By the way, in the Tamil land there was a legendary jurist, commentator and interpreter of Hindu Law. His commentaries were taken as infallible judgement all over S India in the Late Ancient period. Many scholars in the North also accepted his views. His name was Varadarajan Shastri, he was the chief justice in the court of Emperors Raja Raja Chola and Rajendra Chola. Have a look at his works if you can. They are both in Tamil and Sanskrit.

Regards
swamykool

[Dev]

Dear Swamycool:

Thanks, I am not saying u are passing judgement. You have just quoted what u have read or heard.
I have not read Varadarajan's works, I will try to read.
When I wrote above posts, I might have given a wrong impression to others about my views but in reality to cut it short, I am both far and against it.
I have sympathy for the innocent girls who are tortured and live like in a Hell. At the same time, those arrogant ladies who have no loyalty and for the sake of sex, can change husbands even, these are the ones that need to be condemned, I feel. There are many in both types. Anyway it is kali yuga.

Dev

[swamykool]

Dev ji,

Yup, there are good and bad in both genders. One has to be balanced.

Regards
swamykool

[Dev]

Yes I totally agree with u.

Dev

[Zara]

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[swamykool]

Dear Zara,

By my calculations I get Tula (Libra) as your lagna. In the Rashi chart Sun is the 11th L (badhakesh for your lagna) and conjunct with the 7th L Mars. Moon is in Leo, so Sun is the Lord of the Chandra lagna.

In the Nav, Sun is in the Lg (Sco) with Rahu and aspects the 7th H.

During Feb 2005 Rahu was transiting the first quarter of Ashwini (your 7th H) and from 22/02/2005 Transited into Revati - your Nav 5th H.

This appears astrologically as a very weak marriage but a very strong affair.

The affair went on for well nigh 5 years. You may treat this as first marriage and the breakup as divorce.

Regards
swamykool

[Zara]

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[swamykool]

Dear Zara,

I'll have a look at your chart after 26th June. Till then I'm a bit tied up.

[Zara]

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[psha85]

Zara,

Just to answer your questions.. Mercury in the UL could also indicate how you met him, i.e. online as Mercury often has to do with computers or school. It is 7th to AL which shows you might have been an obstacle to the relationship.. meaning maybe you had some issue with it.

For the UL2, yes, it is 2/12 to AL which is not good.. it shows you would reject this relationship or the partners would reject each other. It is also 2/12 to A7 which isn't good either. Furthermore, the lords of the UL2 and 2nd to UL2 are both quite weak. I would venture to say this relation has limited longevity though benefic Moon in the 2nd to UL2 and Venus in 8th could prove to be of some help though I am not sure how much. I would consult expert more on this as there could be other things to look at which I'm not considering here as I am more of a novice.

Hope this helps,


*Pooja*

[Zara]

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[psha85]

Hi Zara-

The UL2 albeit little weak and isn't in good position otherwise, does have a chance of succeeding. Jupiter is aspecting the 2nd to UL2 and Moon is there.. but there is a lot of malefic aspect on UL2 itself which is of concern. It could just be that it would be a painful situation which would turn good later (I'm running one of those types of ULs myself right now so I should know haha). But I'm not really sure at this point. I think you would meet the person by Dec-Jan.. The transits this year (Jupiter, Saturn, Rahu/Ketu) are pointing towards marriage or at least some development in that regard.. so it very well could work out. Seems like he could be foreign.

If UL2 does not work out, UL3 has good strength and is in good position to AL and A7. But let's keep a good thought for this next one hope this helps!


*Pooja*

[Zara]

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[Humannature]

As quoted by someone else..

"Live-in relationships where the two people felt heart and soul for each other might count as marriage - because this is a deeply inter-linked soul relationship. This comes under Gandharva vivaah category - where the two hearts have recognized each other as partner.

Marriage as a sacrament is for ritual purposes - and for those involved in performance of yagnas etc with a dharam patnee (translation..wife). For such agni hotra and such other rituals, it is preferable to marry as per vedas and with rituals before fire. But, otherwise, a deep union of two minds and a interlinked life IS considered marriage - even by the shastras, with the proviso both should have shared this attitude (of mutual love and unconditional affection)"

[Piblush]

The Planets are Devas and their Planet energies.

I wouldn't count long-term relationships, look at marriage only because no matter if you 'think' you are married, you are not and that sanctity of marriage has not been fulfilled.