Difficult relationship with my mother

[Ourvashee]

Hello

I am new here and I desperately want to know and understand why my relationship is difficut with my mother

Since childhood, both my dad and mom has always beaten me and yelled at me severely. (Now my father is deceased). But it is my mother who caused me physical injuries. Once she pulled my hair so much that a handful of hair came out. Another time she threw a rock at me. I also remember her beating me with a chair and causing blood to come out of my scalp. I attempted suicide at the age of 13 because of her abusive behaviour and all the times she hurt me physically.

Fast forward, I still have a strained relationship with her. I once threatened her to not beat or else I will beat her too. She ended up beating me and I beated her too. Since then she barely raises her hand on me but she continues to be abusive and from time to time she will raise her hand on me.

She is affectionate and loves my younger sister to death. My sister doesn't allow her to give me money or anything and since she is scared of her, she doesn't. I know she doesn't love me cos she always abuses me and never my sister. My mother still makes me want to commit suicide but I am a reasonable person and no matter what I do not want to end my life because of her behaviour.

Can someone please provide light about it ?

[Suresh_Chauhan]

Hi, I could not find Candos in Mauritius, so I have taken Quatre Borne as the place of birth, and 10.45 AM as time of birth. Hope it is accurate, and not PM (night).

Your lagna i.e. ascendant in natal chart is Vrishabh (Taurus) whose ruler Venus is exalted in 11th house of pisces. By itself this is a good placement. Mother is signified by Moon which is in 12th house of Aries in your chart. This makes you a Mesha (Aries) rashi person. Lagna = Taurus, Rashi = Aries. This combination itself is female/male, because even signs (Taurus, Cancer, Virgo, etc) have feminine nature and odd signs (Aries, Gemini, Leo...) are given masculine nature.

In Bhava chalit chart, moon goes to lagna, where ketu is placed. MEP of lagna is at 4 deg 13, ketu is at 1 deg 35, and Moon follows right behind at 26 deg 59. So even though its in a previous house to lagna, the "effects" as seen from bhava chart are - a CLOSE conjunction of Ketu-Moon in lagna, and this is primarily what spoiled the relation with mother. Moon also has harsh aspects of Shani (natal) and Mars (bhava). In any event, moon is very badly placed in the chart. Malefic jupiter, (its a natural benefic, but is malefic for Taurus ruling 8th and 11th) is retrograde in 6th from where it casts a direct aspect on Moon. All 3 (ketu, moon and Ascendant) are in Krittika nakshatra, a harsh one owned by Sun. These factors have given very difficult relationship with mother.

But why are you still living with her, if she still abusive?? You are 24 , can you not get job and find your own house or flat? Or stay with friends, coworkers, relatives? Your 12th lord Mars, conjunct 9th lord Saturn sits in 10th house, so your fortune is linked to your karma (work effort) in foreign lands. It will be best for you to move out, and seek employment, if not in foreign country, at least far away from birth place.

[karthik1984]

Hello, Time is AM OR PM.

[vedicmaths]

hello

If it is AM, then moon becomes the atmakaraka.

truly yours,
vedicmaths

[Ourvashee]

it is AM

[Ourvashee]

It is AM in the morning

[supernova]

Wow, its a difficult chart with regard to query. Except for what Vedicmaths Sir said, that reason could be moon being AK; I really can't find anything else wrong in your chart in context of mother!!
If we consider Bhava chart, Ketu sits in 1st house with moon. Ketu-moon in lagna is what I probably feel is the reason for your turmoil with mother.
It also could indicate afflicted mind. How stable is your thought process? Do you have finicky mind or a mind that switches directions too often?

I am a learner only so please wait for opinions of other learned persons here.

[karthik1984]

ourvashee, i think there is conflict between you and your mother due to your extravagant, stubborn nature .


Your father position not good. Any difficulty with him. In my opinion he is a tyrant.

Praying Godddess Parvathi might help improve the relations.

[vedicmaths]

hello Ourvashee,

With moon as AK , born during moon's antar and moon being the sixth lord in
dwadasamsa , sat and mars oppoing the 4th house and a few more attributes of moon
have given you such mother. Having understood her attitude, pull on you life with a
positive attitude to live your life. Put those things behind to take you forward in your
life. Take care that you do not fall for it. Try to earn and settle in your life.

For study purposes, it would be better if you can post the dd/mm/yy or your father's
demise and your attempt on your life. If it is personal, forget it pl.

truly yours,
vedicmaths

[joyd]

our-

There is a seed for every thing and when time comes,that seed germinates and show its nature.Here seed means Father [semen].In your chart the 6th lord sun denotes your mother and 9th lord saturn denotes your father.
In your chart karaka for mother is jupiter[from 4th Leo , the 8th house lord is karak for that house].such jupiter placed in enemies sign Libra, i.e in the 6th house of enmity from natal lagna. so it is clearly reflecting your mothers nature and enmity ,quarrels,wars,misunderstandings bla..bla..

Norw we see -why mother indulging violence factor ?

jupiter with 5 BAV points showing the eccentric nature.Such jupiter placed in 8th from his 11th house Pisces.It means,jupiter spoiled 11th[gains of any kind/elder sibs] and 4th houses[domestic peace/mother].Here jupiter spoiled not only peace of yours but also the total house.Bring placed in 6th ,her violence shown in physical forms[Libra-airy sign] ..

come to seed factor-From 4th lord sun ,the seed house is scorpio[ruler-mars].Now see the logic between mars and sun in your chart.They both are in 2-12 position.It denotes thy themselves in deep mis understandings and fights.In your 9th house [from sun]Rahu placed and trines such sun Denoting the Asura [gaint-rakshasa]nature of your mother.9th lord saturn with mars also showing fathers sadistic nature. Rahu squaring such 9th lord and Mars.

joyd.

[Ourvashee]

JOYD : I understood your clear explanation. All I can say is it is destined I think. There is nothing much that I can do.

Thank you for the time to comment.



VEDICMATHS : I will try to put those incidents behind and move on with my life. I need to start my tertiary studies (University degree) then I will be able to get a decent job and earn. But i had a sharp memory (Kritika) earlier on and now i have had significant memory loss over these past years. It has deteriorated so much that I cannot remember simple things. In my country, I need to be a graduate to secure a decent job, But my now weak memory is a causing a hindrance to my studies. Life hasn't been smooth and hassle-free for me, in the past i had been a victim of black magic. I am telling you all this because you told me to move out. I will but it will take some years cos i have to try to find a remedy for my memory and get a degree to find a job then move out.

You have given me a postive advice and rest assured I will follow it.

Can I ask you why would you need my father's demise date ?
Thank you for taking the time to comment



KARTHIK1984 : I am stubborn and at times extravagant but my mother is adamant and more assertive. So the problem doesn't stem from me.
As my for my father, I cannot say much.
I do pray to Tamil Goddess Mariamman but I will also pray to Goddess Parvati as you suggested.

Thank you for commenting.



SUPERNOVA : You mean to say my chart is complicated ?
My moon is in 12th house in Aries whereas Ketu is in Taurus Lagna.

I do possess an active mind, my thought process is somewhat fast and never-ending.
Thank you for commenting even though you are still a learner.



SURESH_CHAUHAN : Thank you for commenting.

Even though I am 24, I have had problems my whole life. I have been constantly a victim of black magic. I did not perform well in school and consequently I left school without passing my A Levels & O Levels at the age of 20. Normally teenagers get their A Levels by 18/19/20 (age) & their O Levels by 16/17.

Now imagine I didn't have any of these. Plus when i left school, I got an auto-immune disease called ANA. I don't know for how much time I had it.I got lucky cause I had got tested for Lupus & it turned out negative. Things could have been more worse.

Last year, I have been diagnosed with Anxiety disorder/panic attacks. It does take a toll on my health.

I did my O Levels & A Levels as a private student and studied on my own. Again, I didn't remember anything that I studied cos of my now-weak memory. But I managed to get good results.

Other than the issue with my mother, I have other aspects of my life that are still problematic that I need to resolve first.

I had got two jobs in the past but I lost them.

So no, even though I am 24 I cannot move out. It is not as easy as it seems, plus it is not convenient for a girl to live alone, even my mother will not allow it. My point is, I need to get a University degree then get a decent job in order to move out. I had this in mind for some time now.

My life has been a series of unfortunate events but I am still trying be be an optimist. I know some people have it worse.

Also, I have been accepted to study Law at the University but I am pretty sure I will quit because of my memory problems.

GOD BLESS ALL OF YOU.

[supernova]

I meant to say chart is complicated in context of the question you asked. Some questions are easy to figure out in chart while some are not.Though, more experienced people here like Vedicmaths sir, Karthik sir, JoyD sir, Suresh sir.... can easily cut through complexities and have more insight. I use placidus system with KP Ayanamsha and hence could be difference in the chart drawn by you and me. My interpretation was based on Bhav chart , i.e. Moon and Ketu together in First house.
Affliction of mind means not a stable mind, stable thought process which based on your detailed reply, seems very well the case.
Good luck with everything and remember, this time will pass too.

[Ourvashee]

Supernova : You mean I have an unstable mind ? If so, It's something I didn't choose to have. If I had the choice I certainly wouldn't have chosen that.