Anupamji,
Yes, that has been my work since 6 years particularly, Alas !! mostly unpaid
, since I want to understand the person with all his depth.
I, if in your place, would have said that I am doing this work as a karma yogi, expecting no fruits for my labour.
On a serious note, well, it is interesting that you try to understand a person deeply. So you are more into psychology, or to be more precise, spiritual psychology.
The reason is we all people claim with all of our confidence that we know ourselves entirely but the harsh truth is it is a complete 'Untruth because once you have known yourself 'Truly' your 'Human Journey' ends. This whole hustle and bustle, chaos, falling and standing again is nothing but to know 'Thyself'. After this the Spirit manifests itself because no more human barrier is there.
That was from where I predicted long time back that one day you would incline towards 'Spirituality'. Astrological combinations have so many meanings but right meaning comes to you when you have understood the hidden samskaras of the native that he even does not know that is why even Psychoanalysts say Mind is an unsolved mystery but they do not know they are doing nothing but agreeing with our ancient sages unknowingly that they defy most of the times.
Yes, Anupamji, I agree with you on this and what you are saying is true not just when looked upon from a spiritual perspective but from a normal worldly perspective too. From a spiritual perspective, we can’t say we know ourselves unless we identify ourselves with the soul, and otherwise also, if you think from a normal worldly perspective, most people don’t know themselves completely. They may know themselves overall but not completely is what I feel.
About spirituality, well, Anupamji, I am not sure. Yes, I give you full credit for it that you had told me that I would take to spirituality, and I did take to that. But you know when I think over it, I always feel that if my life had got better, maybe I would never have gone into spirituality in this life. So won’t it be correct to call it fate than something that I was interested in. I mean, so many people take to spirituality just because they have failed big time in life. I don’t know, but I many times feel that is the case with me; but that said, I am not in anyway taking away the credit from you about your brilliant prediction to me about my taking to spirituality.
First of all Karmic Patterns are not at all simple thing to understand till the god's grace is not there and when his grace is there then we can't say it is futile to change them. Imagine someone has been a 'Kleptomaniac' since births and in turn he is getting nothing but umpteen diseases in return in his body and in family. He is finding it hard to control this habit of stealing, hence, no matter how much money he has in his pocket he is not finding any doctor to cure these ailments.
In turn he is thinking what wrong has gone from his side. Now do you think he should not do anything to break this age old pattern to remove the misery out of his life once someone tells him the reason of his all suffering ??? No matter it is for the selfish aim to get relieved of his fragile health instead of thinking it is unworthy to steal anything. Basab nobody becomes adult in a jiffy. In childhood a child is given chocolates to encourage him whenever he does any commendable work. Same applies to human being. We all people grow in body but not in mind when it comes to improvement. We need encouragement initially unless as you said it is hard to change yourself. That is why there is a need for some greed to prod us, nudge us.
Yes, Anupamji, I understand this point that you are saying that we need to be tempted by material benefits in order to take us forward when it comes to ‘growing’ as a person. I agree with you that if someone tells you the karmic root for your problems and the way to uproot it, people will choose that over silently suffering the misery, by trying to bring in a detached state of mind.
Anupamji you are skilled in this, but how many people are skilled in finding out the karmic root of a person? So most people in this world have no choice but to accept their fate than trying to find their karmic root as I am sure you will understand and agree with me on this point that when a person constantly suffers, he finds it more easy to give up on the fight than try to find the karmic root to the problem, which is more difficult than climbing Mount Everest.
Does a person have the patience anymore to find his karmic root when he is going through a hell? Well, if someone tells him about it, it is well and good, but to me it seems a bit impractical otherwise. I mean, I am a living example: I have faced the suffering of life. Now, what kind of attitude developed in me naturally? It’s that of surrender. If I try anything with my heart-and-soul, it is to detach myself from my problem. Sometime back in one of those moments of intense agony I prayed to God to take away my wish for something, and now I feel that yearning for that thing which has been with me for more than two years have come down in a big way—even vanished amost. I don’t know whether to call it a coincidence or if there is some logical explanation to it, which my mind has already started probing; but then, it has happened. (God is very prompt in fulfilling our wish when it comes to us wishing that we forget some dream of ours.
) And it is good—one reason for misery gone (though I am feeling sad that my God took away my interest in something than fulfilling my wish about it
). So I think when a person suffers he will pray to God to make Him forget the reason for his suffering, by making him detached from it, by making that reason meaningless for Him if He is not going to make his wish fulfilled. This is what I feel and what I have understood from my own life—I will not call it the universal truth, though. Now, sometimes I do feel this way too that it was better that the desire remained, even if it brought suffering than the desire being take away from me, because with not enjoying that desire, the thirst remains for it somewhere in the unconscious mind is what I feel.
Now coming to this line of yours: "
First of all Karmic Patterns are not at all simple thing to understand till the god's grace is not there", is there anything called God's grace? I mean, God's grace is possible only when we think of God in a personal form, and I guess God is Brahman, and an impersonal God can't show any grace. I remember you had told me sometime back when I said that I feel God helps me sometimes that I am helping myself instead of God helping me, and that is more a concept of Brahman. So is God there? That is the biggest question to me. The rest of the questions will come later. Whose truth is to be believed: that which Dvaita says or that which Advaita says? I don't think if God is Brahman, It will have a heart, It will show it's grace if we call It.
Initially we do it for some selfish purpose but gradually it becomes our second habit. Same as stealing was my old habit and now it turns in the virtue of non-stealing. So, initially it is very necessary. In this way the thief has also understood one important lesson that it was all the result of his bad karma. He has understood one more lesson that doctors are mere instrument and the cure of disease is not lying in their hands. They are only the medium. They are nothing but the medium to work as per his individual karma. He has become a little spiritual now despite starting it all with selfish purpose. He started it with material aspect but this very aspect will surely make him a good ethical man in coming times because seed has been sown by seeing all the things in practically. That is how we grow instead of progressing by leaps and bounds.
Yes, I agree with this logic of yours. This is definitely another way, I am sure. And it makes sense definitely that we can’t expect to reach the goal with one long jump. You definitely have a point here that one has to slowly go one-step-at-a-time to reach his destination. Hurrying will not help anyway but lead to failure and frustration. But I have said how I look at it from another perspective in my previous paragraph.
So, if you go a bit deep you will realise every karmic pattern has to be broken instead of surrendering forever because this kind of surrendering is not going to avail anything for us. Again I would say Surrender is only worthy when you know in front of whom you are surrendering. Are you surrendering in front of human foibles or surrendering before the result of your human weaknesses. Surrendering in front of the consequences of your bad karmas is good undoubtedly, instead of crying and wailing, but it does not mean that I should surrender myself in front of my avgunas also that created those karmas.
Well, I am not saying that one should not surrender to the negative traits in him but only to the consequences of the negative karmas that he has done. I feel that one should not encourage any negative quality in himself giving the logic of destiny, but then, he should definitely surrender to the sufferings that life brings to him and the reason for which he is clueless as the reason for it is to be found in some past life bad karma of his. As I said before, I have this bad habit of arguing and I never defend it calling it my destiny, and I really try to correct myself in regard to it. I used to be very argumentative in real life too; but then, I restrain myself very much on that regard these days. So, you see, where I see something negative in me, I try to correct myself there. I am still arguing here all the time, and I am seeing it is resulting in spoiling my relation with everyone here, but I am trying to curb this nature of mine here also, and I am sure, I will one day. So I definitely don’t surrender myself to destiny completely.
Rest I may write later if you feel we should go on since this is the thread for Valentine Day Wishes
Yes, definitely we should go on—even if this thread is for Valentine’s Day wishes—letting destiny lead the way for us as it is destiny, and not us, which plans our life; and then, who knows maybe destiny will maybe make me meet my valentine here on this thread too someday, bringing the title of the thread under limelight again.
Don't ask me now whether I am afraid of dying a virgin? I will better not answer that question. 
!!!
