Number of Upapadas?

[starwar]

D.O.B: April/29/1983
Time: 12:58 PM
Place: Montreal, Quebec

I'm confused by the concept of Upapadas. I was in a long term relationship for 10 years that started back in 2000-2010 but the UL doesn't quite fit him. Mind you I entered that relationship when I was young and didn't comprehend what I wanted. We never married or lived together and we had a very friendly relationship. I wouldn't say I was completely in love but I cared for him. When does the actual UL count?

[starwar]

Hope someone can help me solve this mystery. I often wonder if UL is the one we truly fall in love with/soul is captured by rather than one having a physical relationship with or relationship that felt more platonic than romantic. I had that 10 year relationship but now looking back it was a relationship I escaped to in my young adult years. I was escaping my restrictive home environment and rebelling against my parents but we never lived together. Did I ever truly give any thought about wanting a solid future with him? It crossed my mind but there was always a hesitance in me. I guess he eventually felt there was no growth in being in a relationship with me and left. I was running my Ketu dasha and was pretty much apathetic towards everything. Fast forward to 2012, 2 years after that long term relationship broke off, I suddenly out of nowhere fell head over heels for a man who fits my UL to a T. Good looking, high society status, playboyish type, lives a very grand life yet there's a charitable side to him but I left running into the night out of fear because it felt like my whole being was shook, when I wasn't looking for anything serious due to my health issues. Yet I was "willing" to give my all. Lot of back and forth for many years ensued but he eventually gave up when I kept giving him excuses. (I was in sade sati after all) I haven't heard from him in 2 years yet he's there in my thoughts daily. How is it that my first long term partner did not fit the UL description and the person I fall for after him does? I had some casual dates in between the long term reltship and the man I fell for, so I don't know how this gets calculated in terms of UL.

[Vamanaavataram012]

Upapada is usually for marriage partner, but the illusion of what the world thinks of this "Marriage/Partnership". This was probably just another 7th house partnership/Navamasa partnership.

[starwar]

There's a lot of confusion regarding what is a marriage in modern day. Some would perceive the 10 year relationship as a marriage. Personally, I felt it wasn't but I can see how an astrologer can perceive it as such. What does marriage entail for you? A ceremony? A promise? Living together? If that man I fell head over heels for ever came back, I would marry him in a heartbeat.

[justicetomeplease]

1st it is determined through UL next UL is seen from 8th from that UL
Suppose if UL is in Cancer sign next UL should be seen from 8th from that i.e., from Aquarius.
This has to be seen for marriage event i.e., a civil ceremony has to happen. Then you can count UL's.
Regards

[starwar]

Excellent! This explains alot since my first long term relationship didn’t fit my UL precisely.